Change
So, things are all achanging. Saturday saw the beginning of another winter school with 170+ students arriving with all the wonder and excitement that that brings. It also brought me a new housemate in the form of Mr Ian Ellershaw who I've seen for a total of about 10 minutes, cos he has a new job as the Dean of students which so far has kept him pretty busy. The weather has also taken a sudden change, going from lovely (and unusual) sunshine to wintery windy dark.
I kind of feel a change within myself too, although I don't know how much is just a response to all the above.
So, yesterday I read
"Jesus left there and went to his hometown, accompanied by his disciples. When the Sabbath came, he began to teach in the synagogue, and many who heard him were amazed.
"Where did this man get these things?" they asked. "What's this wisdom that has been given him, that he even does miracles! Isn't this the carpenter? Isn't this Mary's son and the brother of James, Joseph,Judas and Simon? Aren't his sisters here with us?" And they took offense at him.
Jesus said to them, "Only in his hometown, among his relatives and in his own house is a prophet without honor." He could not do any miracles there, except lay his hands on a few sick people and heal them. And he was amazed at their lack of faith."
Which I couldn't help but think of as being very sad. Jesus goes home and the people who know him best don't believe his message and get offended at his teaching because they know he's 'nothing special' and therefore has no right to preach to them. And consequently Jesus couldn't do anything for them, except the desperate ones who'd take a chance on anyone. It made me think too of how I'm so critical of people I think I know, of judging other people's potential and disbelieving what God is doing in their lives or what God can do through them, or how he's changed them, just cos I know how they've been in the past and don't believe they'll be any different in the future. How arrogant, not to mention sinful. Then there's also my response to Jesus turning up in my own life, my own 'town' and how little faith I have in what he's able to do there, cos I know how its always been, which is again arrogant and sinful, not to mention sad. No wonder he wouldn't do any miracles there. How awful for Jesus to be amazed by a lack of faith.
So I pray for still more change. A change in me. A change in my attitudes and expectations for what Jesus can do in others and also in myself. That I'd be willing and excited to welcome him into the familiar places of my own heart and habits and hurt and with faith and expectation to give him the freedom to be himself. the freedom to work a miracle.
I kind of feel a change within myself too, although I don't know how much is just a response to all the above.
So, yesterday I read
"Jesus left there and went to his hometown, accompanied by his disciples. When the Sabbath came, he began to teach in the synagogue, and many who heard him were amazed.
"Where did this man get these things?" they asked. "What's this wisdom that has been given him, that he even does miracles! Isn't this the carpenter? Isn't this Mary's son and the brother of James, Joseph,Judas and Simon? Aren't his sisters here with us?" And they took offense at him.
Jesus said to them, "Only in his hometown, among his relatives and in his own house is a prophet without honor." He could not do any miracles there, except lay his hands on a few sick people and heal them. And he was amazed at their lack of faith."
Which I couldn't help but think of as being very sad. Jesus goes home and the people who know him best don't believe his message and get offended at his teaching because they know he's 'nothing special' and therefore has no right to preach to them. And consequently Jesus couldn't do anything for them, except the desperate ones who'd take a chance on anyone. It made me think too of how I'm so critical of people I think I know, of judging other people's potential and disbelieving what God is doing in their lives or what God can do through them, or how he's changed them, just cos I know how they've been in the past and don't believe they'll be any different in the future. How arrogant, not to mention sinful. Then there's also my response to Jesus turning up in my own life, my own 'town' and how little faith I have in what he's able to do there, cos I know how its always been, which is again arrogant and sinful, not to mention sad. No wonder he wouldn't do any miracles there. How awful for Jesus to be amazed by a lack of faith.
So I pray for still more change. A change in me. A change in my attitudes and expectations for what Jesus can do in others and also in myself. That I'd be willing and excited to welcome him into the familiar places of my own heart and habits and hurt and with faith and expectation to give him the freedom to be himself. the freedom to work a miracle.
2 comments:
grrr... I feel so convicted right now and I blame you entirely! ;)
There is someone that I've been working with that has turned out to be a nightmare, even more than I originally thought. And I've prayed and prayed and prayed about it.. and wondered why on earth she is involved with a program she is entirely unsuited to. Even more, why God has allowed her to be in a position of authority when she seemingly has no leadership skills. Then we end up having this really difficult week with friends passing away, and getting in a car accident and on top of it getting a miserable cold from my students - and the stress of working with her got to a point that was unbearable and I wanted to just run away.. So I prayed and prayed... and as I was reading in my devotions (which I had been slack on for a while *sigh) I read about David and how he would do nothing to usurp King Saul's authority. I decided I had to humble myself and wait and do all that I was asked and all that was required of me...BUT... I did not expect God to do anything in her heart. Even hoping for it, there is this struggle to believe that this is a prayer God will answer yes to. But I should have greater expectations shouldn't I. I should assume the best. I should assume that God can and wants to do a miracle in her life and make her a woman after His own heart. IT'S SO HARD!!! but I know I must soften my heart and allow him to help me see her through His eyes.
can't help but wonder if i am one of those people who only continue to do the same things... only what you expect and nothing more... i hope and pray that God is making me more than that and i am excited to read of your growth and understanding.. you are an amazing man. Praying for you!
Post a Comment