Words I've been Reading

"Harry Stack Sulliivan, one of the more eminent psychiatrists of interpersonal relationships of our times, has propounded the theory that all personal growth, all personal damage and regression, as well as all personal healing and growth, come through our relationship with others. There is a persistent, if uninformed, suspicion in most of us that we can solve our own problems and be the masters of our own ships of life, but the fact of the matter is that by ourselves we can only be consumed by our problems and suffer shipwreck. What I am, at any given moment in the process of my becoming a person, will be determined by my relationships with those who love me or refuse to love me, with those whom I love or refuse to love.

It is certain that a relationship will be only as good as its communication. If you and I can honestly tell each other who we are, that is, what we think, judge, feel, value, love, honour, and esteem, and are committed to, then and then only can each of us grow. Then and then alone can each of us be what he really is, really feels, express what he really loves. This is the real meaning of authenticity as a person, that my exterior truly reflects my interior. It means I can be honest to others. And this I cannot do unless you help me. Unless you help me, I cannot grow, or be happy, or really come alive.
I have to be free and able to say my thoughts to you, to tell you about my judgements and values, to expose to you my fears and frustrations, to admit to you my failures and shames, to share my triumphs, before I can really be sure what it is that I am and can become. And I must know who I am before I can act truly, that is, in accordance with my true self."
- p43-44 "Why am I afraid to tell you who I am?" - John Powell